Moving

My husband found a house. So we moved there on 18. My husband moved first with his car. Then me, baby and my parents followed about one hour later. The feelings was uncertain. A little bad feeling. But mostly I'm glad cos this is what I want.

I still remember the weather that day. It was really nice. Rain in rantau panjang. Then the beautiful forests on our sides. Fogs. My father stopped at one place to poop, then we saw a wild boar.

When we arrived i found that the house is smaller than I expected. As we're cleaning, i felt good because this is a home. This is where our little family gonna stay. Lack of everything. But it's where we belong.

Now i just put my baby down to sleep. He doesn't like endoi this afternoon. He's sleeping on the floor with me. I really want to take a nap. Noticed this black ring around my eyes. I've never had it my whole life.

I miss my parents. They're kind. Especially my mother. She's an anchor. She's so strong she can do anything. She helped us a lot. She helped with baby. It's as if she's the mother of my child. I only breastfeed him. But she does the rest. Now that she's not here, i need to learn to do everything myself. Giving my baby a bath was a challenge. I did it with my husband the whole time. Thank God baby didn't cry. But now my cold heart understands how important my mother is to me. How kind and selfless she is. I can never be that kind of mother. I wish I inherit her kindness, but too bad I am not gifted with it.