Tuesday, October 19, 2021

Remember

Reason why i don’t like to write anymore is my brain  has found a new way of coping with issues and troubles. I shut them up and pretend it never happened. 

So many things happened these few days. I went to kl. He handled my business. he suddenly felt like he had better idea on how to handle things. He wanted to change i manage and organise. So he decided he’d build a new rack.

Interstate travel is allowed. We went to waterfall. He drowned and all men laughed at him. This one triggered the worst episode of anxiety and depression in him.

He bought pallets to build rack. When he was hitting the hammer to remove the nails, he fought with this old woman, pakhims wife. I interfered. Big fight started. I didn’t talk to him for days. He expected me to accept everything he did. Though he did something wrong.

We made up. But today we went to beach. Both abe came along. One alza over take from the left side. M wanted to turn left, but didn’t see the alza. So the alza was really in shock and really angry. It wasn’t really his fault cause we wanted to exit but we drive on the right lane. He shouted at us. Then this event  like brought  him to another dimension. He’s unhappy and not talking. We went to beach and he’s still sulking. 

I asked my sister to come and join us cause i know it’ll be very dull with him. 

You have no idea how much i hate him. I wish i could hurt him and beat the shit out of him. He is so fucking annoying. He’s thinking i shouldn’t question his decision. I have thousands of words but i choose to swallow them up cause if i triggered him, he’ll explode and give hell to all of us. I want myself to always remember this.

Next month when he left for iran, please ignore him and please remember of all the trouble and shame he has brought to us. Life is better without him. I should drive the car cause it’s only the driving i can’t do. If i drive, everything will be fine. Sis thank 

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